10 Signs You're Dating A Rider

 

They're the love of your life, but you're not theres. Because they have their horse. And now you come to think of it they seem to have a lot of strange quirks which you've accepted without quite understanding. So read on to see how many of these you recognise and how many you wish you didn't. Here's 10 signs you're dating an equestrian...

 

1. Up until 6 months into the relationship, they kept their mud caked fingernails hidden away. Now they’re much more comfortable showing them off, unfortunately...

 

2. When you bring in the shopping, she always grabs the heavy bags with the milk in, with ludicrous ease...

 

3. When you get in their car it has a strange lingering aroma, not awful but definitely not pleasant, you just can't put your finger on it.

 

4. The sound of cursing every couple of months as they split yet another pair of wellies.

 

5. They have a ridiculous amount of clothes with splits and holes in, which should you ever suggest they replace you’re met with an icy glare and a sarcastic comment about the cost of new riding clothes.

 

6. The endless amount of hay that seems to find its way into EVERYTHING.

 

7. They have the strangest clothes, not that you’d ever ask out loud why their trousers have a leather polka dot bum and stretchy neon cuffs.

 

8. They work 9-5, five days a week and they still have no money. Secret drug habit? 

 

9. Every time someone mentions royal showjumper Zara Phillips, they scream: “She’s a ******* eventer”.

 

10. She sleeps in a tshirt that says “Shoulders like a queen, hips like a whore’. You’re not sure what it means, but you’re on a mission to find out...